Wednesday -This Aint your Average Wordfull Post!!! (some Violence & Angst)

We'll Its happened.... My, 15 year old found a boy that quickens her pulse...Frankly, your choices about what to do are very limited !!!

Lets go back in time shall we?? We had her around 9 am in Scottsdale Az. on a beautiful may morning. Precious little baby girl, with beautiful round blue eyes, and the softest sweetest smelling skin I think I had nearly ever smelled. As with every mother who looks foreword to her babies birth, I had so many hopes and dreams about how our lives together would be...
Her birth was scheduled well in advance so naturally we very naively assumed that we knew exactly how it would go down, we didn't then & frankly haven't known much of anything to let her tell it, since then.
What happened?? Where is my baby??? & why is it that she knows full well that I have been on this earth for 38 years & have pretty much been there, done that, yet All that gets me a huff & a roll of the eyes. ( actually I don't really ever see the rolling of the eyes naturally, because by that time, she has stomped away hating me for asking her why, for the billionth time, did she leave her straightener on, & didn't she know it could burn the house down?? ect.....(But then I hear "Mom, shes rolling her eyes again~~ SLAM"!!!) She stands now looking @ me eye to eye as we struggle, her to get me to the ground, me to keep that from happening come hell or high water, even at the expense of not being able to stand upright for the next week and a half!!! ( never , EVER let them see you sweat!!!, or limp around!!) She begins to laugh because I can still take her down ( & thank the good Lord, because if she EVER gets that over on me, I just don't know what might happen to the safety of myself and her sisters. My brute strength just might be what is standing in the way of complete & total anarchy!!!) Then all is well again, until in about 5 minutes,when I do , or say something else that rubs her the wrong way, might even be her name, we just never ever know...
I hear tell that it is her job to hate me, that secretly she doesn't, that when she says go away with her mouth she really means come here, that she needs love and affirmation... But what about when she says it with gritted teeth, screaming, whilst shaking her fist at me with the look of horror, all I see is the whites of her eyes?? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN, HUH??????
I just happen to have kids that are early teens & also a younger one who is 7 ( all girls) so I fit into 2 groups of mothers. Quite a few of my friends happen to have kids lil P's age, so they get a front row seat in this psychotic episode that has become my life and in seeing me muddle through this maze. I hear from them time to time,"Thank goodness that by the time I get there with mine you will have already been through it and I can look to you for guidance... WHAT??? Have you NOT heard my prayer requests??? They go a little somthin like this --" Please pray that I make it through this next week when we will meet again so that once again you can pray for me..... Sometimes you might hear" Please pray that whomever swapped out my baby 14 years ago in the PICU in Scottsdale Az. would contact me and bring my child back, no questions asked. Or it might go a bit like this: " Please pray that I get a word from God soon about when, when will he be coming back for me, I NEED TO KNOW!!!????
I know, its not all that bad, I'm just telling you , if I hear her sisters walk out of their room one more time asking " How does this look?? & hear her HUFF, & make this barely audible noise that has become the benchmark of our rivalry, then see her sister, shoulders slumped, walk back into their room to change for the um teeth time because of her disapproving grunt, I'm going to loose a grip!!!
Ok, seriously I want to end this on a positive note, so as to not offend & so that you don't mistakenly contrive from this that I am not one million percent in love with, & totally adore my child & her three sisters. I know w/ every part of me that they are what I was created for. To love nurture & yes, even mess up in my humanness & imperfectness from time to time. The good news is however, they have parents who pray, & love them plum past the moon and back. There isn't anything that I have ever done (w/ the exception of their births, my wedding day and being in the Lord presents ) that has brought me more pure utter joy or total & complete bliss, than having this life as I walk daily with my babies.
God has been so good to me, & I pray daily that I can be all that He has called me to be for them. If you don't grasp anything else from my mishaps and blunders, please remember this: They are only with us for a minute, after which they are off fluttering around learning life's hard lessons with us hopefully doing in tandem what we are each called to do on their behalf :~~Standing on the sidelines Cheering them on, while we are also " Wearing out our Knees!!" As the word says, "Teach them the way they should go, & when they are old they WILL NOT depart from it....


OK, that's quite enough for now, thank you for your patronage & be certain that I am SO waiting for sage advice and wisdom from ALL of you, because the BOY frontier I have yet to venture in to .... And, as my part of this deal, I will let you know if she gives up the grunt, but as I'm sure you know, its not very likely!! :0)


LA ☻